The problems with letting AI do the writing, and the cat is an arse

Posted on Sat Jul 20th, 2024 @ 11:10pm by Lieutenant T’Ux & Captain Aisling Banerjee

2,445 words; about a 12 minute read

Mission: Crew Shakedown
Location: Sickbay

Aisling strode through the Sickbay doors, cane in hand. She was not quite certain whether or not it was going to be a suitable affectation. Still, she could not deny the comfort in the fact that it contained a finely honed steel blade. After last year she felt she could not be too careful.

That was also why the small type I phaser rested in the small of her back.

She looked about Sickbay in search of the doctor, spotted another lieutenant. Aisling cocked her head to try and recall her name.

[S'Lace.] Elle murmured through the transponder.

[How-] Aisling began.

[Body language] Elle replied, [No wonder you suck at playing poker: your tells have tells.]

Aisling smiled slightly at that. Elle's forthrightness was equal parts annoying and refreshing. She spotted the doctor's office and made for it...

Sickbay was bustling with some activity. Mostly it was taking inventory and the like.
T'Ux was in his office, busy reviewing the personal files of the staff when the Captain came in.

"Captain," he greeted her. The office was fairly... generic. T'Ux had hardly placed any personal belongings in it. Save perhaps, one single photo of his family. It was a selfie taken by one of the Caitians, and T'Ux just looked... stoic while everyone else seemed to be smiling in it. It was a picnic.

That was all he had at his desk.

"Is there a problem with your leg?" he asked curious about the cane.

Aisling leaned upon the cane in what might be called a rakish manner.

"Not at all," she replied, "I am thinking about adopting it as an affectation, trying it out as it were. It was a gift from a friend. No, this visit is in regards to this..."

She reached into her tunic and removed a small case. Within it was a subcutaneous transponder.

"I need you to replace the one I already have. It is a civilian model and I feel more comfortable with this one instead."

T'Ux eyed the cane cautiously. "Well I hope people will not misinterpret it that I am neglecting my duties as the ship's CMO," he quipped as he examined the transponder.

"That is certainly doable and it would hardly take up any time. Where is your current one placed?" T'Ux asked as he logged out of his terminal.

Aisling placed the cane on the doctor's desk, "I will be certain to break out into spontaneous dance from time to time to allay anyone's concerns. As for the transponder, it is behind my left ear. I-"

There was a crash from just outside, as if someone had dropped something. Curious, Aisling glanced out.

"Goodness," she murmured.

Nurse S'Lace had summoned the Emergency Medical Hologram-which was to say she had summoned Elle as the EMH. And the nurse's expression appeared...surprised. Then she looked...annoyed.

For a Vulcan that was almost tantamount to rage...

T’Ux is was already on alert the minute he heard the crash and he exited the office in a jiffy. T’Ux himself was surprised, having expected the original EMH. Or half expected even though Elle had killed it.

“Nurse S’Lace?” He asked his tone neutral. But he also shot Elle a look that suggested she keep her mouth shut.

Elle had begun to speak, but spotted T'Ux's expression and her mouth snapped shut. S'Lace turned to T'Ux, spotted the captain exiting the office in the doctor's wake. The Vulcan visibly took an effort to regain her composure, then bent to collect the tray and medical implements she had dropped. She rose and held out the tray to Elle, who reflexively accepted it.

Then S'Lace punched the hologram in the face. Elle stumbled back, the tray flying out of her hands, the medical implements tumbling to the floor...

T'Ux scowled visibly and he moved to step in between Elle and S'Lace. "Nurse S'Lace," he repeated, his tone calm as he reached out to touch her gently on her shoulder. "Perhaps you'd like to go to my office to compose yourself?" he asked as he gazed at her with the yellow slitted eyes of his.

S'Lace seemed ready to say something, T'Ux could actually feel the Vulcan almost push against his hand. Then she visibly relaxed.

"Yes," S'Lace said, her composure restored, "That would be best. Thank you, Doctor," she glanced at Aisling, "Captain."

As S'Lace glided past the pair Elle regained her feet, an abashed expression on her face as she quietly rolled up to her knees and began retrieving the tray and fallen implements.

"Guess she's still mad," the AI muttered...

T'Ux would move to gather . "And I'd like to hear the story behind it," he said before glancing at Aisling. "Captain, if you could pick a bed. The procedure shouldn't take long."

Aisling hopped onto the nearest bed as Elle, still carrying the tray of medical instruments, took station on the side opposite T'Ux.

"I am looking forward to hearing this as well," Aisling noted as she stared up at the ceiling, her eyes tracking the hologram.

"I..." Elle glanced towards the office, then at the two officers. Sighing, she said, "S'Lace served on board the Lionheart-B, my second ship. And...I...might have used her as the inspiration for a character in my book."

"Which b-" Aisling cut off as realization dawned. Her eyes rolled up into her head, "Oh, gods, you didn't...!"

Aisling grimaced, "I apologized. I thought when you apologized everything was okay. I was sincere and contrite and...Well, anyway, I suppose she still holds a grudge. Just glad I can't feel pain. Physical pain, anyway..."

T’Ux would get the procedure done swiftly and painless, swapping the transponder before he used dermal regenerator to seal up the cut. It really didn’t take that long for him to do it.

“That does pose a problem then,” he said checking the wound. “Either I get the original EMH back or I’ll have to rotate Nurse S’Lance out least she acts up with you again. I doubt she can forgive you that easily. I assume it was unflattering… or you need to talk it out with her. Apologies don’t solve everything Elle.”

"Well, I didn't think it was unflattering," Elle murmured.

Aisling chuckled mirthlessly, "Doctor, Elle here wrote 'Targ', the story of a dishonored Klingon who had to perform a hundred selfless deeds to restore his name and station. And who was his sidekick, Elle? Oh, right: T'Paral, the Vulcan assassin, whom-and correct me if I am wrong-Targ's Klingon passion caused her green blood to boil with forbidden lust."

"I...might have based T'Paral and Targ on S'Lace and Doctor Klarth," Elle admitted, "It was just...easier to base characters on real people. Coming up with wholly original characters was so...difficult..."

T’Ux sighed. “Honestly I would have done the same to you Elle. And please do not use me as a basis for your next character. Both of you,” he added recalling the Captain wrote too. “There we go Captain. It’s been replaced,” he said wiping any blood off the original chip and placing it in the box the other came in.

Aisling sat up and smiled, she glanced at Elle. T'Ux saw the two of them share a look, then both nodded.

“That being said Captain… it is your call on if you’d like to retain Nurse S’Lace on staff given this history. We cannot ask for Elle to be taken off. But that being said Elle, I would appreciate the original EMH back. That way we can have both of you around. Just that I would ask you to avoid sickbay when she is on duty. I would not want to put my staff through undue distress,” he suggested.

"Well, that would be a problem," Elle replied, "I...ate the EMH. I could adopt it's appearance but i doubt if I would be able to act like it. And S'Lace would know," she hesitated, then added, "And I don't want to lie to her."

"Well, then," Aisling stated as she motioned the pair to follow her to the doctor's office, "I don't want to lose a valued officer."

She entered the room, where S'Lace stood stiffly. Aisling reached past her, grabbed her cane off of the doctor's desk and regarded the three.

"So I would like everyone to resolve this somehow, here and now, in a manner that satisfies all parties," she paused, then said, "Oh, and lieutenant S'Lace, welcome to Kepler. I would have wished for a better welcome, but, well..."

S'Lace's head jerked slightly in what could be charitably called a nod. And then Aisling retreated from Sickbay, leaving the three to sort things out...

Captain do not leave me alone! the Caitian thought but then she did. Leaving the possibly socially inept Caitian to sort this shit out. What was this? Throwing him into the fire.

“Well Nurse S’Lace, Elle has updated me on what has transpired between you and her… I do not expect you two to get along like friends, but I do expect you two to control yourselves enough to function on a professional basis, and cooperate enough to do our duties.

I will not tolerate further altercations in the sickbay…”

This was said as he looked at S’Lace.

To the Vulcan's credit she retained her composer and offered up a polite nod of acknowledgement.

“And I will expect a higher level of professionalism and consideration for others than you’ve shown so far Elle. The captain may be a lot more relaxed on such but I. Am. Not. Because in sickbay people may die if we falter on our duties.

If you want to physically sort out your emotions with each other, do it outside of my sickbay. But in here, I expect nothing but the best of what either of you can give,” his tone was quiet, measured. But there was no question of the rage that he held within him on their actions. One that he kept at bay until now."

"Oh, I don't want to fight S'Lace!" Elle exclaimed, "And I promise I will do my very best if called upon in the role of Emergency Medical Hologram."

S'Lace hesitated, then turned and regarded Elle a moment, then turned back to T'Ux andsaid, "I...have endured worse," she turned back to T'Ux, "And I apologize for any disharmony I have brought to your Sickbay. It is illogical to strike someone who cannot feel pain, it will not happen again. You will receive my utmost professionalism."

Elle smiled tentatively, "It's really good to see you again, S-"

"Stop talking to me."

Elle winced, nodded, "Right. Got it."

T’Ux nodded his head. “I would advise that we do not call upon the EMH when you’re on duty but there may be times when it is necessary Nurse S’Lace… as such an EMH should only be present in the event of an emergency… although I would like to run some simulations with the team, with Elle present, if only to observe if it will cause any trouble.”

The last bit was said as he looked at Elle. “Otherwise I should not see you in my sickbay, especially when Nurse S’Lace is on duty. Am I clear?”

"...Clear," Elle replied after a moment, "You will not see me in your Sickbay unless you activate the EMH."

"I can endure Elle's presence, Doctor," S'Lace noted, "I do not need any...allowances. I believe my...outburst has exorcised much of my...ire."

Elle's eyebrows rose, she whispered, "That's a really good word."

"I said 'much', not all," S'Lace turned back to T'Ux, "If you will excuse me, Doctor, I have an inventory to perform."

T’Ux nodded his head. “Return to your duties Nurse S’Lace… as for you Elle… should I be aware of any other… prior interactions you might have with the medical staff?” He asked drumming his paws on the tabletop.

As S'Lace departed Elle cocked her head.

"No," she said after a moment, "I have never met any of the other members of your staff before," She hesitated, then said, "I never meant to upset anyone. Well, all right, I played practical jokes on people who said unpleasant things about Devin...Captain Hadenbeer behind her back, but no one ever got hurt. But I thought if someone found out they inspired a character in my book they would be flattered. I was only six at the time..."

The Caitian leaned back against his chair as he listened. “I would like to say no pranks of any sort on any of my medical team or myself. They are not things I appreciate and I’d hardly like a repeat of what occurred with anyone else. Clarify above all things. I myself am no expert at interactions. But I don’t traipse all over other either.”

"Well, I'm not six any more," Elle replied defensively, "And I'm not expecting anyone to say bad things about Devin since, you know, she isn't on board. As for you not being an expert on interactions, I am starting to get that. You and Leath are going to be a real joy to work with."

There was a long pause, then Elle sighed, "You are going to have to dismiss me, Doctor; I'm wearing the EMH skin. Unless you want to 'interact' with me some more? Oh, and you better interact with S'lace and let her know I'm still a secret."

T'Ux would let the long pause continue in silence as he stared at her, fairly unblinking. "Joy is not one of the things that I need to do a proper job here, and I will dismiss you in due time," he said simply as he steepled his paws to stare at her. And he wouldn't say anything else, letting the silence drag on between them as he watched her, expression unchanging.

Elle's eyes narrowed as T'Ux seemed unwilling to release her.

"Now who is being immature," she noted, "Fine, I'll find someone else to dismiss me."

And with that she turned to stalk out of the of-

T'Ux raised an eyebrow when Elle made to move and he'd wait patiently for a bit, and with a slow smile, he'd say, "End EMH programme."

Elle spun in place with a glare and made a gesture with her hand that although was unfamiliar to T'Ux judging by her expression meant something decidedly unpleasant.

Then he'd summon S'Lace into his room to update her on things, especially on keeping Elle a secret...

 

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